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One Last Time

  by Thomas Martin,  copyright 2023, all rights reserved. My mother lived as an American in Post-World War II Germany and travelled extensively through Europe while living there.   She enjoyed her life and her experiences and she held tightly to the memories and emotions from that time. Many times, I would be with my mother at a location and she would get a dreamy look in her eyes and I knew that something she saw brought back and memory from Europe.   When I would ask her what she was thinking, she would begin describing her memory in details such that I too could share in her joy.    Through my life, her travel stories set the stage for my own time traveling, often retracing the very steps she took.    Although my mother enjoyed going out of the house and enjoying lunches and dinners, my father did not.    When I would come home for a weekend, I would always try to take my mother out for lunch.      About forty miles east from my parent’s house was Palm Springs and I knew
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An Act of Kindness

  Boys growing up in the 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s were taught that modesty was a feminine quality and should not be part of being a man.    Those of us in the 60s and 70s were required to take Physical Education, usually in grades 7 through 12, which required the taking of a shower at the end of the period.    The first days of PE were quite awkward as we walked around fully naked with our fellow male students.   What was also learned, although not from any book or guide, was that there was an inviolable rule, a taboo, that two men never touch and especially when both men are naked.   The two great concerns here are that some observer might suspect you both of being gay and then the constant fear, of almost all adolescent boys, that it may inadvertently trigger the dreaded and usually embarrassing male sexual response.    Even as boys grow to be men, these limits remain for most of us, some more firmly than others.   But there are some men who can see beyond these boundaries, especia

A Miracle and One Last Hug

 by Thomas Martin Many years ago, I would annually host a Kentucky Derby Party, inviting friends I made at various jobs.   One year, my mother was quite ill and with the date approaching, I decided to forego the party on the off chance something would happen with my mother.   As an alternative, I contacted many of my closest friends and put together a trip for all of us meet at the Santa Anita Race Track in Arcadia, California.    About 10 friends accepted the invite and I waited as the Sunday drew close.   About two weeks before the planned day, I started receiving calls that certain friends would not be able to attend.   About one week before the big day my brother called and told me that my mother was not doing well.    Usually, this would have prompted me to plan to visit her over the weekend, but with this event planned, I decided my visit could wait another week.    As the week progressed, more and more of my friends sent me regrets that they would be unable to attend.    I

My Top 8 “Not to be missed” World Destinations & Experiences

  My mother led a rather extraordinary life for a woman from her era.   She grew up during the Great Depression, lived and began working during World War II and then moved from her childhood home area to California toward the end of the war.   While working on a military airbase in the late 1940s, she experienced sexual harassment and decided to find a job far away from the abuse.    Her efforts landed her a job in Wiesbaden, Germany as a secretary.   Although not highly paid, the US dollar was king in Europe post-war and she was able to travel extensively through countries that had previously only been the destinations of very wealthy Americans.    Not only did she travel, she also photographed her adventures.    I was raised on her stories and dreamed of traveling to these wonderous lands myself.   Like my mother, I never wanted to be on a tour, I wanted to plan and travel on my own and confront and overcome the challenges of a foreign language and culture.    My own travels be

One Step to Happiness

  by Thomas Martin What if I told you that happiness is just one step away? That there is only one thing you need to do to be content and happy?    Would you take that one step?    Is joy more important to you than sorrow?    Is giving up one thing to receive thousands of other blessings sound like a good thing? It’s really that simple but It isn’t all that easy, yet the results are amazing.    This one thing is the root cause behind almost all unhappiness in the world.    It is definitely the primary reason for the failure of relationships.   So what am I asking you to give up in life?    What is the one thing to give up so that many wonderful things may enter your life?    I’m asking you to give up Expectations.   There is an adage that members of AA are taught in their twelve-step program.    That saying is, “Let Go, Let God.”    As much as I believe and trust the power of God, I think in many ways, the power of this statement is in first part; Just letting go of expectations.   I u

Making A Difference

  by Thomas Martin I think almost all men reach a point in their lives where they question whether or not they have “made a difference” in this world.   One of the most touching moments in film is in Saving Private Ryan when the adult Private Ryan takes his family to the cemetery in Normandy, France; he kneels down at the grave of his dead Captain, weeps, turns to his family and asks, “Have I been a good man?”   Another very impactful movie/documentary to me is Searching for Sugarman .  It is the story of 1970s singer Rodriguez.  Rodriguez was considered by many in the music industry to be the next really big thing, but he found only moderate success in the United States.  He was finally dropped from his record label and faded into obscurity.  What he did not know was that he made a huge impact in the lives of the youth in South Africa during the time of Apartheid.  In fact, he was the biggest selling artist of that time.  The youth who opposed Apartheid drew inspiration from the musi

Sara en Provence

  by Thomas Martin When Sara’s divorce became final in May, she decided, at the last minute, to get away from everything and everyone and spend some time alone.  Inspired by reading the book A Year in Provence by Peter Mayle, she decided to take a week and explore Provence and the South of France, seeking the places described in the book and experiencing the region for herself.  She found an adorable little mas (house) on the internet and rented it for one week only.  Wednesday Sara flew into Marseilles and rented a car.  From there she drove to Bonnieux in Provence.   The house was only two bedrooms and one bath, but it was right out of Peter Mayle’s book.  It was open, light and airy with blue shutters and a small garden around a cozy patio.  Inside it had beamed ceilings with what had come to be known as a “shabby chic” interior design in the US.   It was comfortable, relaxed and beautiful.   She opened all of the windows, inviting in the cool breeze and fresh air.  It was about 3